Friday, May 24, 2013

On Living Intentionally

Performing 'Rainbow Fish'
 
Of blog neglect, I am guilty.  May has been a month of busyness, which is about the same as every other, I suppose...  I've discovered a word game on my phone that is super-fun and addicting, so while nursing, when I might have been writing, I've been doing that.  So that's the whole truth.  And also, Baby is no longer willing to nurse in the den which houses the computer- too much distraction.  So, no more blogging while nursing for me at this point. 

Two Blue Fish and a Seahorse

What I really sat down to write about here is a subject that's been on my mind...  A few years ago, I started noticing online conversation and book/magazine titles about 'intentional living,'  'intentional parenting,' and the like.  Usually, these terms would pop up in places I enjoyed visiting and reading...  But I didn't give the actual terms much thought. 
Performers and Spectators
 
In the past several months, I started considering what it actually means to live 'intentionally.'  I mean, we all intend to get up in the morning, so we do, unless illness or some such thing prevents it, right?  And life is full of things we intend to do daily, or annually, or sometime in this lifetime.  That's why people have bucket lists, I guess. 

Cool costumes - dolphins and jellyfish
 
But, after reading and thinking about it for some time, I've decided that when the mothers and authors I've come across use the term, they mean something specific about day to day life.  That is, by living 'intentionally', they are doing something to create home environments that are not likely to come about by simply jumping on the cultural bandwagon and letting themselves get carried along for the ride. 

Trying the shark's hat on for size
 
I suppose every person could carve out his own version of living intentionally by deciding what's most important and making sure those areas are included in every day's plans...  As our family gets larger and busier, I realize that keeping the important things afloat day to day isn't going to magically happen.  When all I had at home were little ones, reading great books, eating healthy meals, living the liturgical year at home, etc., took some planning, but happened more easily than they do now, with life pulling us in more and more directions. 

Our new Betta fish named "Wingo' by Baby
 
So, I've been contemplating, reading, praying....

The recent discovery of grass

What's most important to our family?  What is most important to include in the education of our children?  Our extra-curricular activities? 
Determined to fly
 
We have several children now who have widely varying interests.  There are a few common threads, definitely, but they have their own educational needs and desires, as well as other interests, which I think are important to the development of each of them as well-rounded people. 

still trying...
 
As the academic year comes to a close (although we're really just switching to summer mode and continuing on), it's a good time to reflect the ways in which we've succeeded in living as we've intended and the areas in which we could improve.  And by 'we', I basically mean 'me', because, let's be honest, it's the mama who drives when it comes to these things.  Daddy offers much needed input, but in practice, if I don't keep up, we fall short of our goals.

and still trying...


So, here's my list of the ups and downs of the year, and brief plans for the future (not necessarily in order of importantce):
on a nature hike

1.  Great literature.  It's so important on so many fronts.  Kids need a steady diet of really great books, read aloud, over their reading level.  My thoughts on this are material for another post...  I knew we would be spending lots of time in the car this year - at least an hour every day.  So, I stocked up on books on CD for the van.  This has been a huge success.  We've completed several Narnia books, lots by Roald Dahl, Little House on the Prairie, etc.  We have several more on tap.  However, we got a little sidetracked by the Adventures in Odyssey series from Focus on the Family.  These are outstanding radio dramas that teach all kinds of moral lessons.  So, it's a beneficial detour.  However, I think we'll be mixing it up with more audio books.
a photo of marsh grasses by Joy... 
 
2.  Whole foods.  We all feel better (and I weigh less) when we're eating nutritiously.  When evenings are busy, it is tough, tough, tough to make sure it happens.  Last summer, I created a master plan of meal options for each night of the week based on whether I would need a slow-cooker option, a freezer meal, something packed, etc.  I spent hours on this, poring over cookbooks and websites.  I looked at it maybe twice.  I also signed up for the Fresh 20, which has awesome recipes.  I used these quite a bit for nights when I had enough time to actually cook.  What seems to work best is just planning out meals one week at a time based on what's actually going on, getting the shopping done on the weekend, and cooking extra to freeze whenever possible for days when time is extremely limited.  For the future, I really need more ideas for healthy foods on-the-go.  I hate it when we end up eating fast food.  It's fine once in a while, but...  One idea I discovered mid-year are these great little items.  These re-usable snack bags have saved us from using 50 million plastic bags.  They are very easy to wash, and they're definitely more fun than baggies...

Ballet recital...  happiness...
 
3.  Living the Liturgical Year. When the kids were younger, we did crafts and had special meals for so many feast days and liturgical seasons.  I wish I were doing all that now.  What I have managed is gathering a collection of really awesome books for various saints and seasons.  So, now I don't have to count on getting to the library in advance.  Perhaps I should cut myself a little slack since we did have a baby in our family this year.  But, over the summer I'm hoping to complete some plans for special days next year.  We can do better than a last minute "Hey it's your feast day!  Let's go out for ice cream!"  and a quick "St. ____, pray for us!" God bless Uncle Earl who always calls the kids on the feasts of their patron saints and often offers Mass for them. 

taking it all very seriously
 4.  Prayer.  This really needs to be #1 on the list, and, obviously, since it's down here at #4, there's a problem.  I pray with the kids at least 3 times a day.  It's my own inner life that needs some attention.  I know that each little chore and action of the day can be offered as a prayer...  It's just being mindful about this that I find difficult.  Am I more distractible than the average person?  Probably...
Joy's jazz class
5.  Experiencing Nature.  Nature study is always on the schedule when I map things out for the school year.  And it is usually the first thing that gets bumped off when we run out of time.  I do try to make sure the kids spend as much time as possible outdoors each day, but I'd like to be more 'intentional' about nature study.  Fortunately, I regularly find my kids reading from nature guides.  God bless their nerdy little hearts.  By the way, nerdiness is a virtue in my book.  So, for next year and this summer, we're going to try to bust out those nature journals with more regularity.

checking out a bird's nest
 
6.  Math.  I find that many academic subjects flow naturally from life, but math is one of those areas that requires a bit of just-put-your-head-down-and-do-it.  I've tried a bunch of programs, but I keep coming  back to Math-U-See.  For my kiddos, the approach just works. 
 

still trying...

7.  Art.  Until recently, I really saw the study of art, great artists, and art technique is a little on the frivolous side.  I wanted my kids to learn that stuff, because i read books about the importance of it, and I wanted my kids to be better educated in this arena than i was.  But recently, I've had a little epiphany about the importance of creativity.  God is the master creator and we are created in His image.  To appreciate and participate in art is one of the great joys and privileges of being human.  I started out the year by enrolling my kids in a Friday afternoon art class.  It was good.  But, what I really love is the peacefulness of a Friday afternoon gathered around the table with my children, studying works of art together and quietly creating.  So, to that we will return.  There are tons of great art programs for homeschoolers.  I really love this one.

8.  Chores and daily responsibilities.  Kids need to learn to help out.  They just do.  This year I tried a new plan and it was highly successful.  It's not rocket science, but for some reason it never occurred to me previously to divide the kids into teams.  I decided silly names would make things more interesting, so I made one list for 'Team Hotdog' and another for 'Team Milkshake.'  I assigned 2 kids to each team and switched it up every Sunday.  8 months later, it's still working... 

9.  Daily Mass.  For years, we regularly attended Friday morning Mass at our local hospital.  The chaplain was a sweet older man who was extraordinarily kind to my children, regardless of behavior.  Then he retired.  And the new chaplain doesn't have time to say Mass at the hospital.  I need to find another time that works for us because we need at least one extra Mass during the week besides Sunday.  Change is hard sometimes, and I need to get over my denial that my favorite routine is no longer an option. 

As we shift into a slower pace (sort of), my prayer is to focus.  Focus on the things that are really important.  By planning and prioritizing, I actually find freedom to enjoy frenzy-free moments of togetherness.  And that's where we need to be as often as we can. 

Have a blessed day!

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